“History repeats the old conceits
The glib replies, the same
defeats”
--Elvis
Costello
My lovely wife may already be
sick of my opinions. It’s a consequence
of writing these recaps for what, the fourth season? She knows how I’m feeling about something and
if she doesn’t agree but knows that I’m likely to comment she starts to needle
me about it. What amuses me about that
is that I note her saying four or five mean things these past two weeks of
auditions and think that I’ve only
said two; and besides, it’s part of this shtick. But since this is the kickoff post for the
FOURTH SEASON OF THE TSAVFL CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!???!! I feel the need to issue
my annual reminder that I apologize for any offense in advance because I love
each and every one of you, and anything I say that makes you feel differently
is an error on my part and regretted.
NBC, “Build Your Voice Team”? Build
Your Voice Team? BUILD YOUR VOICE
TEAM?? Erin and Gina, are you guys
getting a cut of that??? NBC YOU
BASTARDS! Also glad to see that you remain
unwilling to let the audience experience any surprise by promoting the shit out
of what is going to happen before it does.
You keep on doing you.
So we have newly single (and
super skinny) Gwen back and open the festivities with everyone singing “Get
Lucky” which c’mon, has to be for Gwen and/or Blake if the tabloids are to be
believed and frankly after a few of their interactions (check out her look at
him after he referred to himself as Hookshot Shelton) I’m more than willing to
believe. I root for that to be true and
go on for a little while but end awkwardly and then they can be
passive-aggressive towards each other for the rest of the season. Deb did note though that he was wearing his
wedding ring for at least part of the auditions.
Is it me or have they shortened
up the audition times? From what I
gather they will fill next week so that’s just three weeks. I could have sworn it was longer in past.
The wedding proposal was what I hated
and Deb enjoyed. At the start of the
show when they showed the ring I made some dismissive noise and Deb said “settle
down”. Every time they teased it I got a
little more irritated and soon I could tell Deb had had enough when she said
something along the lines of: “You’re
going to ruin this for the rest of us, aren’t you? Because you don’t believe in real love, you
just hate. You’re a hater.” And she was right because when I saw the
unholy cross between Jay Leno and Guy Fieri that is Jubal proposing to Amanda
(who seemed fine) I did not believe in true love at all and I kinda hated him. I do believe in non-public proposals but my
wife thinks they are sweet and that’s valid so we’ll not mention it again.
Do you have favorites yet?? We do.
But since secrecy is paramount pre-draft I’ll just leave some random
observations without reference to whom they belong.
Deb quotes:
“What the hell is Adam talking
about saying he is good at song choice?”
“He reminds me of Craig Wayne
Boyd.” Me: “He reminds me of Damien.”
“Did any of those extra jobs
include cooking meth?”
“Pat! She has the dress with the cowboy boots SHE
IS DARLING!”
“Bryan Adams???”
Adam: You are the most important person who has
been on this show.
Me: What?
Deb: That is called hyperbole.
“PLEASE DON’T PICK BLAKE!!” *Blake is picked* “AAAUUUGH!!”
“Pat there’s your girl.”
And mine:
There were no fewer than 18 songs
sung over the past two weeks that I did not know. I kept track.
I believe that singers who have a
large crowd backstage are probably nicer people than those that just have one
or two with them.
I’ve always wanted to visit
Budapest.
Is the goth nanny Kat v2?
It makes me nervous that I didn’t
agree with most of the four chair turns, but it says “faulty opinion” right at
the top of the blog, folks.
I so wanted Jeffrey Austin to
sing “Never Gonna Let You Go”.
Kohl’s styleout! Look for Unionbay!
Cantaloupe girl is back!!
I’M A BLIND JOE MAN!
Remember, we’ll likely have to
draft next week so let’s start kicking times around in the comments! IT’S ON AGAIN FOLKS!
Yours in TSAVFL excitement,
Brother Pat
